Just because we’re family doesn’t mean I have to like you. Or do I?

Here comes the pumpkin smells, beers and foods full of holiday cheer.  And then along came a relative who SHIT all over it.  And just like that you are dreading the upcoming holidays.  

Just because we’re related does it mean I have to like you? 

family traditions.jpg 2

I’m part of one of those families that pretends like we can’t wait to see each other every Christmas because our lives are just too busy to see each other the other 364 days of the year.  So we are so amped up for this amazing one day we see each other the love is oozing from each and every one of us.

LIES!!! lol.  Let’s hop on down off cloud nine back into reality.  Does anyone really enjoy these times of year anymore?  Yes, I do get excited about the holidays.  Celebrating it with extended family that are practically strangers..not so much.

I even had to ask my cousin’s wife, “whose little boys are those?” at a family Christmas. She quickly replied with their names as if I should have known.  I instantly asked how do you know them. She looks at me in surprise and reminds me that my cousins were brothers and that makes her the sister-in-law and aunt to the children. (They are 25 years apart in age of course I can forget stuff like that) But, I’m supposed to know this kind of crap about family.  Shouldn’t I?

I suppose it depends on the effort our parents made when were children to make these concrete family traditions.  Well let me just say the only thing concrete in my mind was that once a year we saw these people.  My Aunts hugged me too hard, my uncles pinched my cheeks or called me pet names and said, “How big I was getting.” Cousins were in abundance but we were all so far apart in age we had nothing in common.  We just waited for my uncle to pop in as if he just gotten there in a red suit with a lumpy pillow stuffed in his gut and ask us what we wanted for Christmas.  We played along and the tradition continues.  But why?  Is it so bad, I have lost that loving feeling for my extended family?  I have stronger connections with the guy that changes my oil than I do most of these people.

Is it a shame? Yes.  Do I wish it was different? Yes.  But different in the sense that I may take a selective few and trade them in for better models. So what! I said it, it’s true and if you haven’t said it yourself then you are one lucky s.o.b.

So as the drama begins and the dates start to get haggled over and somebody cries and the other gets mad by the time we finally settle on this magical day we all just dread it until it comes and then stare at the clock for when it is okay to nonchalantly leave because somebody needs to go to bed or doesn’t feel good (Thank you my beautiful four children).  Hugs and kisses. We had such a great time.  It was so good to see you.  Lets do this more often.  Next year this and next year that.  We all pile into our cars and say, “I’m so glad that’s over with.”

I guess the question is really…why do we continue to do this? Is it in hopes that the next generation will do it also but enjoy it more?  Is it even possible. I  absolutely adored the idea of a large family growing up and that is what we seemed to be.  My mother came from a family of 6 and so did my father.  It always seemed like the they were happy.  Is it because they pretended for the children like I am for mine?  Is the cycle repeating itself?  Maybe we need to just break the chain?  Meh food for thought.

I guess we can leave it with you can pick you friends and you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your family.

Cheers!

V.

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